Sitting above our planet in a flying multi-ton metal chamber gives perspective one doesn’t get from the ground. You get the space to appreciate the work and thought that went into creating a vehicle that can take us thousands of miles in disproportionately short periods of time for the first time in history. Every curved piece of metal that makes the fin on top of an engine is measured precisely and exactly, and for only one cause. The people who decided those measurements dedicated the vast majority of their lives to figuring that out. While they may have chose that path because it is profitable, our society is structured (even through its problems) to make it profitable to do things that will advance and strengthen the human race. Money, at its best, represents the amount of value someone gave to society. We take for granted the splendid creations we now have access to and the lives the humans lived who made even the small things possible. That is just the beginning of the lack of awareness of the greater play happening before us.
For too long in my life, and in the lives of so many, the purpose of this all has been and us being ignored or taken for granted. It’s not a decision to take purpose for granted, its obliviousness and/or ignorance. To be oblivious to what you don’t know is not the same as turning a blind eye to what you know to be wrong. This very article is pointing your eyes to see what you may not have before. Giving the reader a red pill in a sense, in which one must then actually turn a BLIND-EYE to it. I think the best info in the world is like that, so good it calls you to be greater, and to not would be knowing your own fault. We should also understand the power of truth and without strong support systems, that can help people actualize on it, people alone may have difficulty implementing it. Even if they rationally know, they should be acting differently/better. Often great pieces of the internet that may induce this existential crisis offer no path to community that could aid in brining that emotional state of wanting to do more, and become more, forward. The reason I can make this claim, is because that is the path I have gone through.
In your life, my life, our lives… we make decisions every day. Some of those decisions we stand by, some of them we are unsure of, and some of them we know to be wrong. If you look at it like a scale, from certainly the right decision to uncertain then to certainly the wrong decision, then the more this ratio is skewed to the side of certainly wrong, the less likely we are to live a life that can be considered done right. The more regret we would then have. Doing things we know to be wrong, and failing to do the right thing is something to regret.
I smoked e-cigarettes and weed, I drank too much. I wasted time doing things that I don’t care about when I would rather be doing things that I care about. But I did things that I don’t care about, almost in procrastination or in spite of myself. I knew these things to be certainly wrong. Yet I continued to do them and it gave me more anxiety, then I used them as crutches to cope with the anxiety it caused.
From thousands of feet in the air you can see yourself in everything. Everything is a testament of your work ethic and ability to stick to your values. Every thing is a judge of your moral code, an idol and an ideal. While an ideal can never be met, it can be the judge and the goal. From up here you can see the beauty of the endless mountain ranges covered in snow, made by billions of years of a rock in space rearranging itself around a molten core. You can tell that they are wrinkles in time, that their height and breadth is a marker of history. Their mass and power is humbling, their vastness is treacherous. Stunningly white for miles, split by communities of people who have decided long ago that their valley was worth building on. Pristine but terribly daunting, to find yourself alone in a snowy mountain without tools or company is almost certainly death. To be unprepared to handle yourself in nature is to sell yourself short. Or to feel even a piece of the weight of the world on your shoulders of humanities future, with friends who do not bother to care, and a support system who does not care. You could know more. You could do better, you could learn more and try harder, but while your internal compass says to go north, the tide you are in is pulling you in every other direction.
To do one thing right is the first step in the right direction. To master one thing is master everything. Mastery is the product of perfect alignment. You in alignment with who you want to be. If you are doing little things every day that you know aren’t in alignment with what you want to be doing, your internal harmony will be disrupted.
You cannot be anyone other than who you are right now and it is naive to put trust into the future. The only thing you can trust is the confidence in each and every decision you make. Is it closer to certainly right or certainly wrong?
I am the bottleneck of evolution. Anyone who realizes that is. All of history, all of existence from square one. Your parents, their families, their ancestors, the animals they evolved from, the organisms they evolved from, the perfect conditions for life to thrive and the magical particles that exploded out of nothing at the beginning of time. That is all you. And me. From something infinitesimally small and infinitely massive we arose. From one tiny point in time, we have arrived here. Welcome to reality. You could be a cat and you wouldn’t even know it. But you got lucky. You’re a human and you do know it. And you know what humans are capable of because you are flying far above the uncrossable mountains below in a vehicle that is the product of the first tool that our ancestor used. The product of chance, chance taken and shaped to purpose. Purpose to do the most that you can because you only have one chance.
So now you’re here. Here knowing that you have the most incredible opportunity in the history of know existence. You have the opportunity to prove yourself worthy of getting that chance. To make sure that you aren’t the weak link in the chain that natural selection will easily and without a second thought remove from the chain. To assume that your chance is what makes you worthy is the bane of all existence. To depend on others for you to be able to live is the heart of all of the problems that our within our control. To hide from decisions because they are hard is what leads to tyrannical governments and the horrible things we saw in the 20th century and all throughout history. We don’t know a thing bout consciousness but we know that it’s the product of hard work and evolution. And the self-realization of being conscious is what drives us to learn more. It’s what makes us curious to the core, to the point that the point of life becomes to understand why. Why are we conscious? What is out there? To know the full story would be to know the mind of god. And whatever that god is to you, you are a cell in it. And we all want to be more like it. That’s why we love beauty, from perfect circles in nature to elaborate stores that put super computers in the pocket of every human walking around on the street. Access to all of known information in your pocket and at your request.
This has been the goal. To be more like god, to know god, to know it’s intentions and reasons. To peak behind the curtain. And we all think that we have to name our cause for that goal, but that goal is the cause and it needs no definition because the search is the reason. You do as much beautiful stuff as you can, you take care of yourself the best you can and make sure that you are always living up to your potential, and that every decision you make is in alignment with that. That you fight the lazy slug that wants to do the seven deadly sins, that rationalizes to you that it’s okay to do them because you are only human. But that is a toxic voice predicated on what we’re trying to evolve away from. That you aspire to please your higher self, the one that is proud when you’re responsible. When you read or go to the gym. When you have a routine that makes you feel smart and strong, when you decide not to drink because you don’t want to tarnish your mind and body. Your higher self is the one that wants to please god, and it is a part of god, so you could say that you are then, a part of god. And you have a part of you that has been tamed over the millinia but that is still shaking the bars if it’s cell. That whispers from the depths of the darkest places in your mind and body. That tells you that your instant gratification is the most important thing. That doesn’t even think about the version of you that exists in 10 years because the version of you that is right now would feel a rush of pleasure to do it right now. I guess that could be satin, if we’re trying to relate to biblical creation.
I’m not religious, not specific to a religion. I believe there is something, some creator, some reason, and some judgement. I think that all of the creation books are trying to explain that you should fucking get your shit together and that you should listen to the God in your Mind and not the Devil in your Head. It’s that simple and these books are just trying to explain it in different ways. And they end up creating what’s even worse than what they were trying to avoid. People identifying with one explanation and associating their ego with the status of the explanation of reality that gives them the most ease at the thought of death. Each of the creation stories preaches love and discipline. Then people misunderstand, and enforce. Then there are problems. But because these are the oldest stories we have, they are worth reading and thinking about. But reading to learn what people are trying to explain when they write them. They are pretty vague and i think their status over the last few thousand of years proves their value of a worthy attempt to explain why you are here and what you should do. I think that level of respect, of trust in word, makes its own point. People know they should be doing better than they are and they let their weakness and fear control them. No one would go to church if they were doing perfectly. You go to get better at living life. Then, when people cannot control their selfish urges, maybe they blame the religion. Maybe they blame religion and general and think that they should be as chaotic as possible in spite of the ideal life. Because they are offended by the idea that they don’t have their shit together and that they should probably get it together. Hence, forgiveness. It’s never too late to get your shit together, aka it’s never too late to accept jesus christ as your lord and savior. yes we had to make names and stories to say that because what i have written here may be to harsh to be heard well in the main stream.